Monday, November 08, 2010
Closing the Nebraska chapter of my life.
There's an old Scottish hymn that explains my leaving. "Will you come and follow me, if I but call your name? Will you go where you don't know and never be the same? Will you let my name be known? Will you let my love be shown? Will you let my life be grown in you and you in me?"
Many, many years ago I said, "Thy Will be done." It has taken me places I never dreamed of and made friends I never would have met. I've provided services and been provided for in ways I could not have imagined.
John, from Mississippi, showed up at my door unannounced, and I knew I was headed south. I just knew. That was ten years ago. If I didn't get clear intuitive messages, I could not have pulled up stakes and left, but I know that I know it is Thy Will.
In meditation this past July, I was advised to put a "For Sale" sign in my yard before noon Saturday. There were boxes everywhere, almost ordered chaos that went against house showing advice. Thy Will, truth, defies logic.
I continued to sort, sell, box and donate from over a hundred years and four generations of family. The Library was beneficary to hundreds of books. Anything I could replace, I gave up. Actually, I paid ahead. I gave so I can receive. What goes around comes around.
A beautiful Sat. morning dawned. I walked to the hardware store early. They had for sale signs but nothing to hold them in. None at the First Street store either. It was approaching eleven, and my stomach was tying in knots. Diane picked me up. Chris bolted my signs to her metal real estate frame. Just before noon I placed it. My heart in my throat, I went into the house and sobbed. Surrendering my will wasn't easy.
A couple of days later I showed it and liked the couple right off. They'd been in town five days. She and I have so many similar interests, it was like looking at myself at that age. She loves the bones of the house and the happy energy. I didn't mind leaving it with them. I gave up a house and gained dear friends.
It was hardest for Aja. "Why do you have to leave?" she pleaded.
If I said it was God's will she might be angry with God. "I will be back." So help me God. "We are forever friends."
She nodded. "Will you visit my school?"
"Yes, and Ryker's." I talked to their parents before I made a promise. "After school, we'll go grocery shopping, take it to your house and fix supper for your family." It gives each of us something to look forward to, and we love to create in the kitchen.
"When are you coming?"
"I'll be back before Christmas." She was placated.
Ryker is glad to have another boy in the neighborhood. It's been all girls all his life: eight years. And Alec is in his grade.
Aja came to the door when the new owners and I were the kitchen. "Aja this is Brandi, and she likes to cook."
Aja looked up into her big brown eyes, "Can I cook with you?"
I can go now.
2010 Red Convertible Travel Series